The End.

"The end of all our explorations will be to return to where we started and see the place for the first time." -T.S. Elliot

Saturday marks the end of the my academic career, a career that began in pre-school (in 1987) and proceeded with no interruptions until May 15, 2009. Wow! In one day I will reflect on the journey and celebrate its end. This is exciting but also scary. This week I have felt every kind of emotion possible, from depression, fear, and anxiety to joy, peace, and jubilation. IT IS OVER! That is so weird for me to say and think. I don't know what I will do without school but I know I will have an identity crisis. If I am not a student, then who am I? That is a good question, one I will be wrestling with for the next 6 months indeed.


So, my journey at Denver Seminary began 3.5 years ago, in January 2006. I do not really remember what caused me to pursue a Master's degree at a Seminary, but I know I was excited that I did not need to take the GRE to get in. Denver Seminary was close to home and seemed to be a place that would "give me answers." I applied, got in, and then wondered what the heck I was doing...gosh, I of all people did not belong at a Seminary! That is where holy, righteous, upright, moral people go! But, I took a risk because I sensed a call from the Lord. I was in search for answers. I wanted to cultivate my mind and be filled with true knowledge. I wanted to get a grasp on what I truly believed and why I believed it. I wanted a better knowledge of who God is and what He has done. I wanted to learn about the most important things in life. I wanted to be challenged to think, to reason, to use my mind. I declared my major as Christian Studies mainly because I did not know what I wanted to do with my life. The first year I took some basic required classes and experimented with a Greek class and a leadership class. Neither of those struck my fancy. Then I took an apologetics class. The prof was terrible but the material grabbed my attention. I drank it up! I loved it-finally, evidence for what I believed. After that semester I changed my major to Philosophy of Religion. Once again, I wondered what the heck I was doing...philosophy involves a different way of thinking. You can't just be smart to do philosophy; you have to be intellectual and know how to think philosophically. I was not this person. But, I took a risk because I sensed a call from the Lord. Thank God I listened! The philosophy program challenged me in ways that I had never been challenged before. It was tough but by the grace of God I made it. And, by cultivating my mind, I grew closer to the Lord, closer than I have ever been before.

I leave Seminary with an MA in Philosophy, but that degree sounds ways too smart for me. I am not THAT smart! I'm just an average Christian girl who went to Seminary to get answers and grow closer to God. I leave satisfied. For the first time in my life, I close an academic chapter feeling satisfied and equipped to outthink the world. Although I leave not having a job lined up, I leave with a passion-a passion to educate. Before Seminary I was a member of the anti-intellectual culture of American Christians. I leave Seminary with a passion to go into the world, especially to teenagers, and change this stereotype. I want to teach people to think, to use their God-given minds!

The journey ends for me today. I am about to leave for campus for the last time. For the past 3.5 years, I have driven to Denver at least twice a week to learn. I can't believe I have made it! My academic goals and dreams fulfilled...finally! It's a great feeling! I could say so much more, but I will leave it at that!

To eharmonize or not???

I'm almost 26 and have no husband, no boyfriend, and no potentials (that I know of). Recently this had made me more desperate than normal. Thus, I have seriously been considering signing up for e-harmony. Problem is I only found 4 matches in Colorado. You see, eharmony lets you create a profile for free and it shows you your matches. I filled out the profile and, low and behold, four guys popped up. Problem is without paying I cannot see their pictures or communicate with them. Sad! Also, did I mention that eharmony is $65 a month? That seems a bit outrageous to me! Furthermore, I wonder if I am recently, more than before, doubting God's timing and provision? I mean I guess that God can use the WWW to hook people up, but I almost think that by signing up for eharmony, I am taking matters into my own hands and trying to speed up the process. Something just does not seem "right" about it. To eharmonize or not?